One would think with all that is happening in the world an amateur blog writer would have plenty to write about. Sadly, when Covid shut down the world my desire to write was shut down right along with it. With all of the doom and gloom swirling around me I felt compelled to keep my thoughts contained. I didn't then, and I still don't now, have much to offer that would make anyone feel better. I don’t have any positive or uplifting posts to brighten anyone's day. I will not be uploading photos of myself looking glamorous as I successfully work 40 hour weeks whilst also, "unsuccessfully” homeschooling my children. I wont be sharing posts of my pristine home beautifully decorated with quarantine crafts. And I surely wont be providing recipes of all the delicious home cooked meals we've enjoyed. Let’s be real, I don’t even remember the last time dinner wasn’t delivered right to my door step. Thank you, Door Dash!
But, what I can show you is what a stressed out, cuss word slinging mother looks like when she is running solely on caffeine and prayer, sporting yesterday’s eyeliner and last weeks pony tail. My voice is hoarse from the billions of times I’ve had to yell at my kids to do school work, to go to sleep before 5 am, and to pick up their messes. Honestly, I’m not sure my children have learned anything these past several months, unless watching K-Dramas counts as Foreign Language. The Science experiments for my virtual learners consist of identifying foods left out during midnight snacking or found stuck down in the couch cushions. This makes for a fun quarantine game that I like to call, “What's that smell!?!”
There is nothing easy about parenting during a pandemic. There was no handbook given out when my children were born that told me how to navigate through something like this. If there had been I would definitely have asked for an extra copy. I have no idea what I am doing or how my choices will impact my kids in the future. For my own peace of mind and in an effort to spare the little sanity I have left, over these past few weeks I’ve decided to take a step back. I’ve come to realize my kids are safe, healthy and loved. They've never experienced anything like this either, except maybe in Minecraft. They’ve been isolated from friends, removed from their schools, and are experiencing the same anxiety and fear that we adults are experiencing. If losing my own shit a little less by not overreacting when alarm clocks get ignored and some assignments get missed, helps them to keep it together, it’s okay. We’re okay. We will get through this and worst case scenario, they can do all their missed work in virtual summer school.