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I had an idea something was coming our way. I listened to news throughout the day, everyday quite religiously. At first it was to make sure I was more up to speed with the political happenings than my husband, since we have opposing political views. I wanted to be sure I was always able to one up him. But not long after I began to listen the talk of Coronavirus began and I found myself listening and waiting for the words that would sound the alarms in my mind and kick my "mom stress" into high gear. Of course, I held onto some faith we were not going to feel the same impact as the rest of the world. I mean, were the United States of America, we can handle anything. Naive, I know.
As the weeks passed my anxiety began to heighten. Rumblings were taking place here and there and I would overhear bits and pieces, though not enough to say it was time to panic, but enough to tell me to mentally prepare for an impact of some magnitude. Last week the calls came from my children's schools informing parents they would be closing all private and public schools in hopes to slow the spread of the virus. Here I was thinking, "I just enrolled my 13 year old in private school (with a tuition fee), after homeschooling for 4 months, and now, were homeschooling again!" The difference is now I write a monthly check comparable to a car payment to have my daughter sitting around in the same clothes for days and days on end. Thanks Coronavirus for that one. Thankfully I do not need childcare for my children and I am blessed to have an employer whose concern for staff and consumers outweighs the need for me to be in the office putting myself and others at risk. So what does that mean, that means I am here, with the children, all day...every day...for who knows how long.
Currently I am limiting our contact with the outside world, though I did leave for the first time this week to pick up groceries. It felt like a Mission Impossible episode with having to dodge coughs, and dart through aisles without being seen or touched and maintaining a 6 foot distance. Easier said than done. Humming the theme song in my head I was able to get enough to last us through a few weeks. I am not hoarding by any means. I don’t have an overstock of toilet paper or hand sanitizer. I am not getting into fights at the check out lines of the supermarket or visiting numerous stores in a day to cheat the rations being enforced. What I am doing though is cleaning and sanitizing twice a day and making my husband stay far away from all of us until his work decides to close or until I can convince him to pitch a tent in the yard. The reason for my panic is that between myself and my children we have several medical conditions in this home, Asthma, Chiari Malformation, Mitral Valve Prolapse, Hypertension, as well as an adorable young lady who is just about 6 months old and is counting on the big people in her world to keep her safe. If running around the house with a spray bottle of bleach makes me feel I have some control over an otherwise powerless situation, just step aside and let me spray it.
I'm not sure that my anxieties will decrease anytime soon, at least not until this pandemic subsides and we have all come out healthy and unharmed. Until then, cover your coughs, wash your hands, don't kiss babies, and for the love of God, just stay home! Take care and God bless you all.